•10:49 AM
Sometimes when I am in a social group situation, I am flabbergasted at how "out of it" I feel. The conversation is going a mile a minute and everyone present seems to know all the details about everyone else's lives. I figure that they must be talking all day long to one another on the telephone. But my phone isn't ringing. Hmmm. I feel so out of the loop sometimes.
Well, the truth is, I have been out of the loop.
Recently, I signed up to participate in a group bible study at the church I attend. That is, I signed up online. Afterwards, I was sent a link to an online group used for communication within this group. The link was for a Facebook group, only we haven't had an account on Facebook. So I signed up, under Self-Reliant Man's name, not mine. I really didn't know anything about Facebook yet.
The next thing I know, Facebook is suggesting that I add friends to my account. What more, it is suggesting to me people that I actually know. I figure Facebook searched through my email address book and matched them to account holders. So I naively started connecting to the friends. A little later, out of curiosity, I open up my Facebook homepage and voila, there is a continuous newsfeed of comments and photos from several of my Facebook friends. I see now that they are sharing little snippets of their lives as they go along through their days, sometimes several posts a day. I find this fascinating. Suddenly, I know more about their daily life than I have in months. Is this what everybody has been doing?
Some of these people, (and I am not referring to anybody I know who reads my blog), when I see them and ask how they are doing, they reply "busy". Maybe now I see why they have been so busy? So how do I handle all the knowledge I can now accumulate through Facebook?
When one of my 50 Facebook friends reports that they had a really bad day, that their child is sick, that their car engine died, that their uncle needs prayer, that something bad or sad happened, am I now responsible to respond to this? After all, we all go through multiple minor crises throughout our everyday lives, and for those friends we rarely see, most of them are long forgotten or glossed over by the time we catch up with each other in person (or by phone). I can see, however, that I will now feel guilty if I do not respond to the daily ups and downs that I read about. What if I just passively read through the posts and don't respond at all? Will they think that I don't care? Do they expect to hear from me if they report that their child did well on a test today, or that they got a flat tire? How do I respond to the incredible volume of information I now have access to?
(As an aside, right now for some reason, our family is on the prayer update email list for three churches. How do I pray for all the prayer requests for three churches? It is the same dilemma. Too much information.)
Not to mention that the temptation to check several times a day for new posts from friends can be very powerful. After all, it is like looking through a daily newspaper when all the news is about people you know. This can be very interesting. But again, too much information. I feel like I am teetering on the edge of a black hole, to be sucked in forever at any time. Can't I run away from it all and just have friends the old fashioned way, relying on telephones, email, and getting together from time to time? If I don't get into this, do I have to forever feel like I am out of the loop?
Socializing is forever changed. And right now, I just want to whine... "do I have to?"
Well, the truth is, I have been out of the loop.
Recently, I signed up to participate in a group bible study at the church I attend. That is, I signed up online. Afterwards, I was sent a link to an online group used for communication within this group. The link was for a Facebook group, only we haven't had an account on Facebook. So I signed up, under Self-Reliant Man's name, not mine. I really didn't know anything about Facebook yet.
The next thing I know, Facebook is suggesting that I add friends to my account. What more, it is suggesting to me people that I actually know. I figure Facebook searched through my email address book and matched them to account holders. So I naively started connecting to the friends. A little later, out of curiosity, I open up my Facebook homepage and voila, there is a continuous newsfeed of comments and photos from several of my Facebook friends. I see now that they are sharing little snippets of their lives as they go along through their days, sometimes several posts a day. I find this fascinating. Suddenly, I know more about their daily life than I have in months. Is this what everybody has been doing?
Some of these people, (and I am not referring to anybody I know who reads my blog), when I see them and ask how they are doing, they reply "busy". Maybe now I see why they have been so busy? So how do I handle all the knowledge I can now accumulate through Facebook?
When one of my 50 Facebook friends reports that they had a really bad day, that their child is sick, that their car engine died, that their uncle needs prayer, that something bad or sad happened, am I now responsible to respond to this? After all, we all go through multiple minor crises throughout our everyday lives, and for those friends we rarely see, most of them are long forgotten or glossed over by the time we catch up with each other in person (or by phone). I can see, however, that I will now feel guilty if I do not respond to the daily ups and downs that I read about. What if I just passively read through the posts and don't respond at all? Will they think that I don't care? Do they expect to hear from me if they report that their child did well on a test today, or that they got a flat tire? How do I respond to the incredible volume of information I now have access to?
(As an aside, right now for some reason, our family is on the prayer update email list for three churches. How do I pray for all the prayer requests for three churches? It is the same dilemma. Too much information.)
Not to mention that the temptation to check several times a day for new posts from friends can be very powerful. After all, it is like looking through a daily newspaper when all the news is about people you know. This can be very interesting. But again, too much information. I feel like I am teetering on the edge of a black hole, to be sucked in forever at any time. Can't I run away from it all and just have friends the old fashioned way, relying on telephones, email, and getting together from time to time? If I don't get into this, do I have to forever feel like I am out of the loop?
Socializing is forever changed. And right now, I just want to whine... "do I have to?"
|
4 comments:
No, you don't have to! And I don't! I am a member of 2 local libraries, and refuse to join any online groups for either. I am assisting in a bake sale for one next weekend to help pay for damage done by a bursting pipe, and not covered by insurnce, but I don't feel like I have to do every little thing that comes along (like, help plant flowers in front of the library, a recent request). You have two children and a husband who depend upon you to keep their lives on an even keel. They come first.
It is addicting to see what others are up to all the time, but the information overload would probably be too much to bear. No facebook for me!
This is also something that I marvel about people of my generation getting sucked into, and which I feel no pull towards at all. It's more than I can deal with, and it's more about me than I want to reveal/share/bother people with.
My children have Facebook accounts, but they're very careful who they accept as friends on them. I can see that it can be useful, in a very strange, virtual relationship sort of way. My son joined a Facebook site for his first choice of university, and began to realise that the other people on it weren't his type at all, and that he would prefer somewhere where the students were less aggressively self-promoting and (apparently) with such perfect lives. Of course they won't have perfect lives, but he felt that it all added up to a very harsh environment. So now he's changed his choice.
But for me, blogging is quite enough.
Hi VM!
S-RM already friended me on Facebook; do you have an account too?
Peace,
Stacey
I sometimes feel out of the loop when people begin to discuss television shows. I don't watch television, mostly b/c I don't have time. My spare "down time" moments are spent blogging and reading blogs, nothing left for t.v.- I do have to sleep you know.
Hee hee, so anyway, I don't know what people are talking about when they discuss Biggest Loser and American Idol (though I have seen some of that a few times) etc.
Heidi